Well, it's time for some crazy recap action! Today on our schedule is Heroman episode one!

168 images, spoilers for episode 1. Warnings: copious amounts of swearing (Sorry there, Joey), attempts to be humorous, much capslocking, and lots of AMERICAAAAA


WHAT'S IT TIME FOR? WHAT'S IT TIME FOR? WHAT'S IT TIME FOR? WHAT'S IT TIME FOR?

HEROMAAAAAN!!!


I think they had a scene like this in Midori no Hibi's opening. Except it was from the side. And there wasn't a gaping hole in the earth.


I-ISSAC AND MIRIA? WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?


JOEY! BIO-MERGE DIGIVOLUTION!!!


AMERICA!!!! FUCK YEAH!!


Look at this smooth motherfucker! What a little badass.


THIS IS WHY YOU CONSTANTLY BACK UP YOUR DATA.


STAN LEE CAN YOU BE MY GRANDPA? YOU ARE SO COOL. AND THIS MIGHT BE YOUR BEST CAMEO EVER.


H-Haruka? From FLCL?


You see, this is problem with having a giant robot. They tend to be surrounded by destruction.


BFFs, ALL THE WAY.

Okay, now to the story...


Space: the final frontier.


These are the voyages of the starship Enterprise.


It's continuing mission: to explore strange new worlds, seek out new life and new civilizations, and to boldly go where no man has gone before!


*FZZZTTT FZZTTT*


Alien 1: Goddammit! It's on EVERY FREAKING CHANNEL! Someone's messing with our signal!


Alien 2: Are you sure it's not the antenna? Sometimes it gets bent and the signal goes wonky. Whatever it is. Fix it.


Alien 2: Lost is on tonight.


HEROMAN EPISODE 1: BEGINNING


Announcer: IT PUNCHES!


Announcer: IT KICKS!


Announcer: It's the laughably-named HEYBO!


Joey: The Heybo... how cool!


Joey: My name is Joey Jones. I'm a middle school student whose aim in life is to become a world class actor and ballerino! That's a male ballerina, you know. Well at least, that was my goal...


Joey: Until I met Stan Lee. That's him drinking coffee at the bar. He told me about an idea he had for a giant robot series, and now I want to pilot robots! It's a lofty goal, but you always have to reach for the stars!


Joey: I live in Center City, California. It looks sorta like a mix between LA...


Joey: ...and maybe Santa Barbara or something.


Joey: This is my grandma. Don't let her size or age fool you, she's been the undisputed Queen of Rock and Roll for sixty-two years and going!


Joey: And these two... they're my parents, Issac and Miria. I hear they were once thieves, but eventually started to go around the country helping people and making the world a better place.


Joey: Mom, Dad, I'm off to school!


P.S. SCHOOL STARTS AT 7:50 AM.


Lina: Hey! Joey! Wait up!


Joey: Oh. Hey Lina. What's up?
Lina: I was just wondering if you could help me with my lines for the next school play.
Joey: Yeah, sure thing. But why ask me?


Lina: You were... you know... pretty amazing playing Juliet in Romeo and Juliet last quarter.


Joey: GEEEHHH I thought you were never going to bring that up again!


Lina: I just can't help it! But it's not fair, you know! It's not fair that you're so good and look so feminine! Leave some leading lady roles to the ladies, you know!
Joey: Honestly, I don't WANT to play women, it's just what I'm always cast as...


Will: JOEY!


Will: Stop hanging around my sister. You're POOR. And you LOOK poor. And you SMELL poor. And you're... REALLY POOR.
Lina: Will!


Joey: Hey Lina, it's alright. I mean, if the only way he can try to hurt me is using childish means like this, then let him.


Will: Childish means? How dare you say that to me?
Joey: Damn his hair is pointy. I wonder how it stays to straight? A lot of gel? Hairspray?


Will: Huh? HUHHHH?
Joey: Oh, no, he uses wax on it.


Joey: I know why you're really picking on me all of a sudden... I know one of your secrets. You're a horrible kisser... Romeo.


Will: YOU LITTLE FAG. WHY DID THEY GIVE YOU THE PART OF JULIET ANYWAY? AND I HAD TO KISS YOU IN FRONT OF THEN ENTIRE SCHOOL. AND MY PARENTS! I'VE NEVER BEEN SO ASHAMED.


Sai: Put him down!


Sai: It was a freaking play, man. Suck it up. It's just making it obvious that you're not secure in your masculinity.


Will: Nnnngh...


Will: Fine, I'll put him down. But I'm taking my sister and leaving!


Joey: Maturity of a two-year-old, I tell ya.


Sai: You didn't have to bait him like that, you know.


Joey: Sometimes getting a rise out of him is worth the pain it brings.


GOD BLESS AMERICA.


Miss Vera: And today we're going to do the math to prove that my hair can be used as a rocket.


Joey: My version of Heybo would have one totally beefy arm!


Joey: Best. Idea. Ever.


Sai: Damn straight.


Joey: Yay! Class is over! It's time to see my favorite crazy scientist engineer guy!


Denton: Hey Joey!


Denton: Did you see? DID YOU SEE?
Joey: See what?


Denton: I did it! I finally did it!


Denton: I hacked all the television stations! Now nothing but a message by me plays!


Joey: Jesus christ, Denton! You could get arrested for that! What were you THINKING?


Denton: Thinking? I was thinking about how AWESOME it would be.
Joey: I don't want to be around when the cops show up and I have to get to work, so I'll see you later.


Sai: Honestly? He hacked all TV channels? That's pretty impressive.


Joey: I guess. I just worry about the guy. One day he's going to go too far. Or discover how to make awesome giant robots. I'm hoping for the robots.
Sai: You're such a nice guy, Joey. You're always worrying about others.


Joey: Naw, I'm just doing what anyone would.


Sai: Damn, he looks like such a girl like that. He should cut his hair or something... try to bulk up a bit. He's such a stick, but he has such great curves... It's almost unhealthy.


Sai: And fantastic legs! DAMMIT JOEY, STOP LOOKING LIKE SUCH A GIRL. That's it. I need to get him to put on some weight.
Joey: Holy shit!


Joey: The rich boy brigade has a Heybo!


Joey: I want one...
Sai: Freaking rich kids always getting the cool toys.


Rich Kid 1: I want to play with it!
Nick: NOOO IT'S MINE!!
Rich Kid 2: Let me see it!
Heybo: Fuck this shit. I'm outta here.


Heyboy: My freedom is right around the corne—


Heybo: RRRRGGGHHHHHH!!!


Joey: No! Heybo!


Rich Boy Brigade: Whoops.


Nick: Oh well, it's trash now.


Joey: Sweet! YOINK!
Sai: You know what you're doing is dumpster diving.


Joey: Techincally, it's not DIVING, because he was on the top. But you know I'm a certified dumpster diver. I've passed all the qualifications.
Sai: So you're going to fix it?
Joey: Oh yeah I am. And you know what this calls for? THAT'S RIGHT, IT'S TIME FOR A MONTAGE!


The hour's approaching, just give it your best
You've got to reach your prime.
Thats when you need to put yourself to the test,
And show us a passage of time,
We're gonna need a montage! (Montage!)
Oh it takes a montage! (Montage!)


Show a lot of things happing at once,
Remind everyone of what's going on! What's going on?
And with every shot you show a little improvement,
To show it all would take to long,
That's called a montage! (Montage!)
Girl, we want montage! (Montage!)


In anything, that we want to go,
From just a beginner to a pro,
You need a montage! (Montage!)
Even Rocky had a montage! (Montage!)


Always fade out in a montage! (Montage!)


If you fade out it seems like more time has passed in a montage... (Montage!)


Joey: *phew!* That was a good montage!


Sai: Hey man. I brought some burgers!


Joey: Sweet! And you're just in time, I'm almost done here!


Joey: Ready for this? Say hello to...


Joey: HEROMAN!
Sai: Heroman? That's sort of a dumb name.


HEROMAN


Joey Huh. The sky is getting sorta ominous. Oh well.


Joey: Okay, Heroman! You're all fixed up! ...well, except for your hands. I don't know how to make hands, so you have pegs. You can... you know... stab people with them or something.


Joey: Heroman KICK!!!! Heroman PUNCH!!! Oh crap! Look at the time! Heroman SEEYOULATER!!


~SILENCE~



*CRACKLE SNAP!*


Lina: Lightning? We almost never get lightning here. This is California, not a midwest state!


Lina: Hey daddy! Thanks for picking me up!


The Daddy: No problem, sweetums. Sorry I'm late, your brother and I ran out of our hair wax, so I had to buy some more.


Joey: I wonder how the owner of this restaurant was able to give me a job... I mean, I'm still in middle school, so isn't this illegal? Well... I need the money, so...


Joey: Whoa, rain? We live in California so this is surprisingly uncommon the last few years. This is good though... we could really use th—


Joey: HOLY SHIT I LEFT THE WINDOW OPEN AND I REMADE HEROMAN USING AN AWFUL LOT OF CARDBOARD. CRAAAAPPPPP.


Joey: I GOTTA GO!
Patron 1: Is Joey wearing a skirt today?
Patron 2: ...I think so...


Stan Lee: What's the rush, Joey?


The Daddy: Lina. I hear you've been hanging out with a boy named Joey. And he's poor. I don't like poor people.


The Daddy: They smell like poorness. I forbid you from seeing him again!


Joey: HEROMAN, NOOOOOO!!!!


*ZHA-PAMM!*


Joey: Fuck the what?


*Zrrrk Ztttt*
Joey: Hero...man...?


*ZIPPP!*
Joey: AWWWWFUCK!


Joey: Why did I touch something that was obviously crackling with electricity? I just... couldn't help myself.


Joey: Whoa what the hell? What is this? Some sort of crazy cast?


Joey: Ooo, shining button... desire to push rising... rising... OH WHO AM I KIDDING? *push*


Joey: WHY DID I DO THAT?


Joey: Oh... wow...


Joey: Grandma is going to kill me.. my room is wrecked!


Joey: ...and there's also a big robot in it...


Heroman: .......(Wait. Where am I? Is that kid with my controller a girl or a guy? I can't tell...)


Joey: OMG OMG OMG OMG HEROMAN!!!
Heroman: ........(Hmmm, sounds sorta like a guy...)


Driver: Wow man, I'm really sorry. I swerved to miss the downed lamppost, but I had no idea you were behind me.
Tanker Driver: It's cool, dude. The rain has made everything more slick, so I didn't have the control I thought I would on the road. I'm just glad no one got hurt.


The Daddy: OUT OF THE WAY, YOU PEASANTS!


The Daddy: I don't stop for anything, because I'M RICH!


*Ka-BOOM!*


Heroman: ......(Hmm... I think that was an explosion.)


Joey: What is it, Heroman?


Heroman: ...............(He's just... such a feminine kid. He needs to man up.)


Joey: Maybe if I push one of these buttons?


Joey: OH GOD MAYBE THIS WASN'T SUCH A GOOD IDEA!


Joey: Oof! Heroman! Where are we going?


Joey: HEROMAAAANNNN!!!! STOOPPPPPP!!!!


*SCRREEEEECHHHH!!!!!* *RRRSSSHHHHHHHHHCRUNCKCRUNCH*


ROBOTS: BANE OF STREET LAYERS.


Joey: It looks like the accident is up there. How can we get there? By jumping?
Heroman: .....(Jumping? It's manly, but you should also be smooth.)


Heroman: ..............(I prefer getting to ledges by teleportation.)


Heroman: ......(Easy to do and leave a lasting impression on your fans.)


Joey: That car... It's... It's... totally owned by some spoiled rich people!


Joey: I KNEW IT! Oh! And Lina's inside! She's pretty cool, we've got to get her out!


Joey: Please Heroman! Save them!


Heroman: .......(He's so girly, but he's sort of adorable...)


Heroman: .......(Alright. I've made up my mind.)


Joey: Maybe if I keep pushing buttons...?


Heroman: ..............(I'm going to make this kid into the biggest badass ever.)


Heroman: .........................(Watch closely! This is the most badass way to save people from cars.)
Joey: Wow, Heroman, you're amazing!


Joey: Whoa, this does not bode well.


Heroman: .....(Hmm...)


*SHA-BOOOOOOM!*
Joey: WAAAHHHHGGHHH!!!


*KA-BLOOOOMMMMHHHH!!!!!*


Joey: O-Oh no! Heroman! Lina!


Heroman: ...............(It's cool kid, I've got them. Pretty badass, yeah?)


Joey: Heroman!! You're my hero! ...but you could have left the dad.


Heroman: ............(Don't be a dick.)


Joey: Wow, my very own super robot...

MEANWHILE:

Alien 2: THANKS TO THIS RETARDED BROADCAST, I'VE MISSED LOST. I'm going to kill whoever's behind this. Have we located the signal yet?
Alien 1: Yessir! It's coming from...


Alien 1: ...Earth!


I would buy this comic in a heartbeat.


OM NOM NOM


ZZZT BZZT


Awwww, Shy Boy...!


Who plays baseball? THE CAST OF HEROMAN PLAYS BASEBALL.


GO HEROMAN GO!


What a smug bastard. ♥


COME ON SAI AND JOEY! YOU CAN DO IT!


Heroman on drums~!!! GAAAHHH!!! ♥


I looooove the art for this series. It's pretty simple, but so appealing to me!


Still want this comic. BADLY.

NEXT TIME, ON HEROMAN:

Aliens from alien spacecraft!


Aliens directing traffic!


Joey does not like aliens!


Heroman punches the shit out of aliens!


All this and more on the next episode of Heroman, "Encounter!"

So I already said it, but I love love love love this series. It's easy to poke some fun at, but it's such a blast to watch! The story seems fun, I love the art, the characters are awesome, and HEROMAN IS SUCH A CUTE ROBOT. Kyaaa~! And when the clean ending comes out I am going to icon the HELL out of it!

Now I just have to stop myself from buying the Heroman R2s... it'll probably come out stateside eventually... and it'll be so much cheaper... but I bet the booklets will have great art and there might be a sexy box.. ARGGGHHH! I don't know if I can afford to get the R2s for both Durarara!! AND Heroman!!! GAAHHHHHHHHH we'll see.

Next recap will be up no later than the end of the weekend. I think I'll try to get an episode or two of Durarara!! recaps done tomorrow, but who knows what the day will bring!