Lord Ace of the Fictional Lands (ensuing) wrote,
Lord Ace of the Fictional Lands

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Bitchin' and Moanin'

Sonuvabitch, I'm so angry.

So I go downstairs this morning and see that my mom has picked basil. She tells me that if I'm just sitting around watching TV, I should take the leaves off the stems. She tells me to pass on the info to Alexandra. Okay, can do. But I ask her why she has basil, and she tells me it's for dinner.

Now, in my family we've created this cooking schedule. My sister and I have to cook at least one balanced meal a week. My parents made the menu for the week before she or I said anything, so we just picked meals to cook. I was going to make pasta with fresh pesto, but I thought I was cooking on Thursday, so seeing fresh basil threw me off. I told her that I thought tonight was BLT night and that pasta was tomorrow. She tells me I'm wrong, so I look at the menu, and yup, I was wrong. I get breakfast, go back into my room and do my lazy summer activities (drawing, watching anime, etc, etc). She calls me down at about 2 to take her to the store. She wants me to drive more, and I'm tired of arguing with her foolish half-assed reasoning, so I take her there and back.

I was in the middle of a bit of a crisis involving work, so I wasn't in the best mood. Then she found out that I hadn't left a forwarding address with the SLO post office, so I got yelled at. SORRY? I told just about everyone that needed to know and I sure as hell didn't want half the stuff places did send to me to be forwarded here. But, it had just happened that my check for work was sent to SLO instead of San Ramon because they just figured I was still there (I had changed my address on all my Viz stuff, but I didn't make it clear enough). It's an honest mistake on all sides and I'm not angry about it, but it caught my mistake, and therefore got me in trouble. It's all cleared up and life is okay, so that is that.


Anyway, I go downstairs after a couple hours to get some water and I see that my mom has gotten everything out for dinner, so I figure that she's making dinner tonight. She even TOLD me what she was doing with the pasta. Okay, whatever. I'm not going to nose my way into it. I don't really want to cook. I'll help Alexandra tomorrow. I thought that I'd help her out when it got closer to dinner just to avoid magically getting into trouble.


I was working in my room with my headphones on. I've told my parents countless times that because of the way my room is positioned I can barely hear them call from downstairs, but they continue to call me from downstairs. This time I had my headphones on, so OF COURSE I can't hear them. My dad had even seen me earlier with them on. But what does that matter? I'm supposed to psychically know when they're calling me.

Well, I guess she wanted me to make dinner but was just telling me what I should do and getting everything out for me. Uhhh, okay. Well, I was downstairs anyway so I thought I'd help out. She asked my dad for a spatula, but I was closer to them, so I grabbed one and handed it to her. She looked at me with utter contempt and took it. I noticed it was dirty, so I ask her to stop for a second to see. She glared at me again and continued with slightly exaggerated motions. I told her I saw something on the spatula so I thought it might be dirty and she huffs, "It's FINE."

Dinner is finished and eaten and my dad brings up cleaning the house. Alexandra and I already know what we're supposed to do, so we told him. He asked us when we're going to do it, and I told him that I'll do my part (vacuuming) either tomorrow or Friday. NO, THAT'S NOT GOOD. My mom has an investment meeting at our house on Monday, so I should vacuum on Monday. I really don't like putting things like this off, so I sort of shuffled my feet and said that I would rather vacuum Friday. My mom spoke up and said that because we're having mulch delivered, I should do it later. It's not like I'm busy or anything. She actually told me that. I was taken back because she has NO CLUE WHAT I DO IN MY ROOM. I COULD BE DISCUSSING WORLD PEACE IN HERE AND SHE WOULD THINK I WAS WATCHING ANIME. Now what do I really do? Mainly watch anime, draw, and play video games. I'll work when I have work to do, but I'm not going to be downstairs looking for things I could do to help out the family. If I'm around and not busy and I see something that needs to be done, I'll do it.

Anyway, I let her comment slide and said that, yes, okay, fine, I'll vacuum on Monday. She told me that since I was doing that on Monday, I could help her move mulch on Sunday. Fuck no. I told her after she told me she ordered it that I would not help her. I hate working with mulch and I have too many horrible childhood memories from dealing with it. She laughed at me and said that I never worked with it. Yeah okay, NO. The three of us kids were always the little monkeys who had to move the crap. I mean, the parents did it too, but we were working for hours moving it RIGHT THERE WITH THEM. Then we had to clean it all up later! Once there were grass seeds that took root in the mulch and we spent countless hours pulling out the grass. THE KIDS DID. NOT MOMMY. (My dad did lots too) She took that to mean that only the kids had ever worked with mulch, and she started yelling at me. Well, OBVIOUSLY that's not what I said. She told me that I never do anything for anyone except myself, I'm a horrible stuck-up child, I suck, I'm lazy, I haven't done anything since I got home (oh, those 12-hour work days don't count, I guess), etc. etc. I was pretty upset and I asked her what had she really done. She rambled off a couple simple things so I batted them back with a couple simple things I did. My dad tells us both to be quiet because neither one of us will win, but I told him that I didn't care about winning a game of "who works more," I just wanted her to realize that I do work too, but it never gets noticed. She started yelling again about how I never do anything, so I jokingly said I would start a gold star system for every time I did something. She told me I should and that I couldn't even do the dishes, she's been doing them. You know except, I unloaded and loaded the dishwasher yesterday while she did the handwashing. It's not something I'm looking for praise for, but it's not like I want her to think that she did it all by herself. She told me that I was lying. WHAT? She THANKED me for doing it. Alexandra backed me up on it too. She finally gave in and admitted that I had done dishes, BUT THAT'S ALL. Yeah, whatever. I told her to believe what she wanted and just left.

OH GOD I WANTED TO PUNCH HER. The things she does are SO TINY, I don't see how she can think she does so much. She spends most of her time on her computer doing her Landscape Architecture work, which, by the way, is COMPLETELY HER CHOICE. It's like if I took and art class and then never helped out around the class because I said that I had so much to do. It's just like, playing games are my choice, I should get out of work because they can take up so much time. It's dumb. Most of the things she does anyway are for her enjoyment. Gardening? She loves it. I do not. Why should I get in trouble because I don't do the things she loves?

UGH. It's so dumb but it makes me so mad. I'm so sick and tired of being treated like a useless person when I pull my weight. I feel like I'm the stage hand of the family, no one notices the work that gets done, but it's necessary to keep the show going.

I'm also tired that she always says I'm lazy because I'm almost always in my room. I'm in my room because:
1) I'm not allowed to have my things outside of my room for extended amounts of time (luckily RockBand is an exception).
2) I do my work (YES. WORK. LIKE VIZ-WORK, DESIGN WORK, ETC) at my computers which are, surprise surprise, in my room.
3) She'll make annoying comments about what I'm doing if she sees me doing... well, just about anything.
4) If I'm around her too long, she'll say things that piss me off or (I swear she does this) will pick fights with me when she's in a bad mood.

Of course, nevermind that if her computer was in a room she'd be in that room all the time. HUH.


I think I'm going to play some Nocturne to improve my mood. Or maybe some Digital Devil Saga... that just came in today...
Tags: family, rant, whine
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